I came home tonight, signed in to my Facebook, and was brought to my knees.
My friend Laura lost her little boy today. He was due July 31st. He died in utero and at this very moment, Laura is going through labor to deliver him.
I know Laura because of her sister Melissa. When she and I became friends, much like our other close friends, her family welcomed me and Howard into their fold. Melissa’s mom and sister became like our mom and our sister. And no amount of miles or years has changed that. When Melissa gives me updates on Sue and Laura, my heart warms with affection because it is like getting an update on my own family.
So hearing this news today has broken my heart. Howard and I are trying hard to wrap our minds around why this happens to such wonderful people. I cried while making dinner. Laura and her husband didn’t deserve this. Their beautiful son didn’t deserve this. Melissa deserved to be an aunt for the first time. Sue deserved to be a “grammy” for the first time.
It’s no news that I too lost my baby very early.
And though I know the loss is just as significant, I cannot imagine carrying a perfectly healthy baby to term and then just before meeting him or her, losing them instead.
How the hell people make it out of this kind of tragedy amazes me.
I know Laura and her entire family will get through this but I also know that they will be forever changed. The sun won’t shine quite as bright. Things that brought easy smiles won’t be so simple anymore. Everything will be shadowed by this heartshattering tragedy.
We prepare ourselves for death and the natural progression is to hopefully pass on when we’ve lived a good portion of our lives…leaving behind a legacy of children and grandchildren, good friends and family. It’s still devastating to lose people we love but at least we have memories to carry us through. We take comfort knowing they at least got a chance at life.
Where are Laura and Vladi’s answers for their Luke? Where are Melissa’s answers for her nephew?…Sue’s answers for her grandson?..
All I can do is offer comfort for them and prayers because I know that nothing I say will ease the pain of this tremendous loss….and hope and pray that there’s a method to God’s madness.