Aug 28

hi guys!

Did I mention I was going out of town?  Oops.

Well, I’m on kind of a hiatus for about a week or so…hopefully not any longer.  I’ll fill you in on all the details when I get back.

Just didn’t want you all to think I was slack and just not posting.

Be good and hopefully, you’ll hear from me relatively soon.

Smooches.

Aug 24

I was having a “moment” yesterday. I’d found out some things that upset me. I picked up the phone to call….someone…I’m not even sure who I was going to call, when the phone rang in my hand.

I answered it and heard my father-in-law’s voice on the other line.

As we made our pleasantries and he asked how I was, I hesitated, not quite knowing what to say…I couldn’t even reply with a standard: “Good thanks, and you?”

Instead, I burst into tears and was immediately embarassed. I love my father-in-law but I’m not close with him like I am my mother-in-law. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great guy, was a wonderful father to his kids, but we don’t have the same rapport as Mama Jean and I have.

I am amazed at how quickly, he turned into “dad” mode and comforted me. He didn’t even waiver. There was no awkwardness. He just said what I needed to hear to feel better.

I thanked him for listening and then thanked him for being a good father to his kids. I thanked him for always being kind and good to me. I thanked him for always supporting Howard and myself in whatever we did. And even when his unsolicited advice annoys Howard, I thank him for always wanting to be involved in his kids’ lives. I thanked him for being so damn normal.

I wasn’t fishing, I just wanted him to know that. I needed for him to know that even though we’re not as thick as thieves, I admire him and really am grateful to him for doing such a good job raising a wonderful man like my husband and his two brothers.

After all of my accolades, he said:

“You know, I’ve always thought that you were the best thing that ever happened to my son….really honey….I mean that.”

I immediately teared back up and thanked him, blushing.

Getting a parents’ approval is, whether we want to admit it or not; is one of the deepest desires of any child’s heart. Even if it is an in-law.

Then the pleasantries returned, I told him to be sure and call Howard at work, and we said “goodbye.”

As a child of divorce of two parents who, after they went their separate ways; could never get past their utter hatred of each other, to be decent parents, I am grateful to my in-laws.  My parents rarely spoke on the phone even while growing up.  Granted, a big part of that was because my father was in large part, absent.  But, when they did speak, they never hid their contempt for each other, even for the sake of their own children.

It was different with Howard’s parents.  They divorced when the boys were teenagers.  Of course, it was difficult, of course there were hard feelings.  But he and Mama Jean always agreed on one thing:  they LOVED being parents.  Their relationship didn’t work so much being married, but they were committed to their kids.  Even though all of their kids are grown, they still speak regularly.  In fact, they’re the best of friends now that they are no longer married.  I love that.

I love that no matter how old the boys get, there isn’t anything Howard can tell Mama Jean that Larry (my father in law) doesn’t know within the week and vice versa.  I love that in spite of all the ugliness from a divorce, they never stopped parenting their kids together.  Both of them recognized the commitment it takes from both parents once they decide they want to bring children into the world.

They said: “Hey, we might not have worked out, but we made three kids together, so let’s suck it up, and concentrate on getting these boys’ raised.”

They did that, and didn’t even live together anymore.  But you didn’t see either of them running off basking in the potential of being “child-free”.

I only hope that if, god forbid, Howard and I find ourselves in that situation, we’ll be the same way.

And I hope that if my daughter or son-in-law needs a phone call like I did yesterday, I can rise to the occasion like Larry did.

Aug 24

It’s actually a funny little meme posted on another site by Dusty’s little sister.  It was so cute, I hate to copy and put it here.  I hope you all see the humor in it.  Enjoy!

Friends: Tell you not to do something stupid when drunk

ALASKA Friends: Will post 360 degree security so you don’t get caught

———————————————————

Friends: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs

ALASKA Friends: Call your parents drunk as hell and tell them about the nasty bitch you tried to pick up

——————————————————————–

Friends: Hope the night out drinking goes smoothly, and hope that no one is late for the ride home.

ALASKA Friends: Know some wild shit will happen, and set up rally points and an E & E route.

—————————————————————

Friends: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

ALASKA Friends: Will be sitting next to you saying, Damn…that shit was fun ”

——————————————————

Friends: Cry with you.

ALASKA Friends: laugh at you

———————————————————

Friends: Are happy that someone picked up a one night stand and leave them alone.

ALASKA Friends: Will Crawl naked into the room with a camera and hope for the tag team.

——————————————————–

Friends: Know a few things about you.
ALASKA Friends: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.

——————————————————

Friends: Will leave you behind if that ‘ s what the crowd is doing.

ALASKA Friends: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

————————————————–

Friends: Would knock on your door.

ALASKA Friends: Walk right in and say, “I’m home!”

—————————————————-

Friends: Will try and talk to the bouncer when you get tossed out of the bar.

ALASKA Friends: Will buck up and go after the bouncer for touching you on the way out.

——————————————————-

Friends: Will wish you had enough money to go out that night, and are sorry you couldn’t come.

ALASKA Friends: Will share their last dollar with you, drag you along, and try to steal free drinks all night.

—————————————–

Friends: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough.

ALASKA Friends: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, “Bitch, you better drink the rest of that shit, you know we don’t waste.” (*cough cough…Dusty…cough cough)

——————————————

Friends: Want the money they loaned you back next week.

ALASKA Friends: Can’t begin to remember who owes who money after taking care of each other for so long.

———————————————

Friends: Will say “I can’t handle Tequila anymore”.

ALASKA Friends: Will say “okay, just one more…” and then 2 minutes later “okay, just one more!”. (*cough cough…Dusty…cough cough)

————————————————-

Friends: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.

ALASKA Friends: Will knock them the fuck out!!

————————————————-

Friends: Will tell you “They’d take a bullet for you.”

ALASKA Friends: Will actually take a bullet for you.

—————————————————-

friends: will not let you to drive drunk

ALASKA Friends: will get you to drive drunk to go to mcdonalds at 2 am (HA!  Except when you live in the bush)

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Friends: Will ignore this

ALASKA Friends: Will repost this!

Aug 21

As of late, I’ve been pretty uninspired.

Well, maybe that’s the wrong word.  I’ve been inspired everyday.  I feel a post forming itself in my head but then *POOF* the idea evaporates.

Or I’m just too busy to put pen to paper, or here in cyberspace, finger to keyboard.

There are a lot of things going on right now.  Good things and some things not so good. Either way, honey, I’m as busy as a (say it with me now) one legged man in an ass kicking contest.

Hunting season begins September 1 and the guides are already starting to trickle in along with their questions:

“What’s a young girl like yourself doing in a place like this?”

I’ve got to come up with some good comebacks this year.  And I’ve got to work on my poker face.

There’s a definite chill in the air and I swear some of the leaves are already turning.  Which makes me sad.  It’s been a pretty fun summer.

I am, however; looking forward to cranking up my snowmachine again and pulling out all the wooly sweaters, my favorite jeans, and buying some new, much needed winter gear.  For now, I’m milking what’s left of the summer by getting on the river as much as I can and BBQ’ing outside as much as possible.

So, if you see a frazzled red head around here with some serious roots going on, give her some sympathy, and please don’t ask her dumb questions like how she got up here.

Aug 19

I wanted to share with all of you what happened to us on Thursday on yet another kayaking adventure.  Howard emailed the story after drinking lots of beer on Friday to everyone in his address book.  I was on that list and reading it from his perspective is hilarious.  This story is heavily edited for grammar and spelling.  Plus you know, I’m sober and all.

Also, I’d like to state for the record that I wasn’t “in hysterics”.  I just wasn’t sure what to do, except tell him to lose the god damn kayak and paddle and save himself.  Enjoy!

“There is nothing more fun than getting out and floating on the river kayaking…Christina and I have gone out on the Kuskokwim a few times.  The river is not too swift.  But it is cold and large. 


Yesterday, we went down the river.  We had a great time..
I got out of my kayak along the bank…to look for a lost camera from another trip… I did pretty good getting out and getting back into the kayak.
It was a great day.  It was sunny and 70+.


We paddled with no real problems…Until I tried to disembark.  Chris made it to the bank and I was pushing hard to get ashore.  The current was pushing against me.. I had to push deep, and as I did I pulled myself under!
The Kuskokwim is a very cold and unforgiving river…
As I flipped, I cried out”fuck” and went under…


I righted myself and grabbed the back of the boat while hanging on to the paddle.
The water was cold!  I hung on to the boat and the paddle as the current pulled at me.
Chris was by the shore and in hysterics watching me flail in the water…She could do nothing but watch me…


I was about 30 feet from shore holding the kayak and paddle.  the more I pulled to shore, the more the current pulled me out…
I told Chris that she would best help by getting out of her kayak and helping me from shore..
I was drifting out as I saw her dump herself out and claw her way up the bank.  Seriously, she clawed up the bank…


I was in the river holding onto the boat and paddle..as I was kicking to shore, one of my Crocs fell off and floated down stream.  As I was holding on to the kayak and the paddle, I contemplated the  possibility of letting go of the kayak and paddle in order to go for the Croc that was floating away…


Chris was frantic as she said “Let the Croc Go”  She was also yelling to me to let the Kayak and paddle go as well.  


The Croc went floating down stream… I held on to the boat and the paddle…
Every time I pulled with the paddle, the current pulled me out.
I swam my fat ass from the main current to about 20 feet from the shore.  But the current kept pulling me back out.


Chris kept yelling at me to let go of both…

As I was kicking myself toward the bank…I kept being pulled out… At one point, I was able to throw the paddle on shore.  Then i was able to take hold of the back of the kayak and push it forward and on the bank.  At that point I was able to swim ashore…at least to the point of finding bottom and making my way to the bank..
Man that was a trip!!


What did you do after work yesterday?” 

Aug 18

A Sorta Fairytale-Tori Amos

On my way up north
Up on the ventura
I pulled back the hood
And I was talking to you
And I knew then it would be
A life long thing
But I didn’t know that we
We could break a silver lining

And I’m so sad
Like a good book
I can’t put this day back
A sorta fairytale
With you
A sorta fairytale
With you

Things you said that day
Up on the 101
The girl had come undone
I tried to downplay it
With a bet about us
You said that
You’d take it
As long as I could
I could not erase it

And I’m so sad
Like a good book
I can’t put this day back
A sorta fairytale
With you
A sorta fairytale
With you

And I ride along side
And I rode along side
You then
And I rode along side
Till you lost me there
In the open road
And I rode along side
Till the honey spread
Itself so thin
For me to break your bread
For me to take your word
I had to steal it

And I’m so sad
Like a good book
I can’t put this day back
A sorta fairytale
With you
A sorta fairytale
With you

I could pick back up
Whenever I feel

Down new mexico way
Something about
The open road
I knew that he was
Looking for some indian blood and
Find a little in you find a little
In me we may be
On this road but
We’re just
Impostors
In this country you know
So we go along and we said
We’d fake it
Feel better with
Oliver Stone
Till I
Almost smacked him
Seemed right that night and
I don’t know what
Takes hold
Out there in the
Desert cold
These guys think they must
Try and just get over on us

And I’m so sad
Like a good book
I can’t put this
Day back
A sorta fairytale
With you
A sorta fairytale
With you

And I was ridin’ by
Ridin’ along side
For a while till you lost me
And I was ridin’ by
Ridin’ along till you lost me
Till you lost
Me in
The rear
View
You lost me
I said

Way up north I took my day
All in all was a pretty nice
Day and I put the hood
Right back where
You could taste heaven
Perfectly
Feel out the summer breeze
Didn’t know when we’d be back
And I, I don’t
Didn’t think
We’d end up like
Like this

Aug 15

A couple of weeks ago, my friend Dusty taught me how to kayak.

Howard and Thai took our boat and went fishing and Dusty and I planned to kayak to where they were and just hang out and enjoy the company.

I was amazed at how easy it was and how much I loved it. Dusty and I took a leisurely float to the mouth of the two rivers that converge here and started our paddling once we hit the river with the opposite current. I kept waiting to flip over and make an ass out of myself but that never happened. Even while he and I play-jousted and splashed each other.

I just knew I’d never make it up that damn river but it was surprisingly easy. Finally, we met up with the other guys and after we each shared a good swig of red wine, courtesy of Thai, (swooning and swearing to never wash my mouth out after drinking from that bottle) he and Howard decided to test me and see if I could handle some serious wake.

Thai took the wheel and did circles whipping up one hell of a crest as Dusty instructed me just how to navigate them.

I passed with flying colors. Impressed the hell out of those boys. Who says I can’t hang?

They then took off on upriver and left Dusty and I to start our gradual float back down to the mouth.

Dusty and I, once again, jousted, bumped our boats, and splashed each other, secretly wanting the other to topple over so we could point and laugh before coming to the rescue. It never happened.

Mainly, because Dusty and I are stubborn bitches.

Dusty said something while we were floating that really resonated with me:

“Out here, it feels like we’re a millions miles away, when it’s just around the bend, it’s really hard to be angry in all this beauty.”

Or something similar to that.

By the time we got to back to the mainland I was hooked.

Then the weather went to shit and it was weeks before I got to do it again.

Just last night, Howard and I took the kayaks and floated down the mouth and were originally going to just let the current take us where our truck waited but he got the big idea to check out a slew that ran along side the mouth.

I was clear on the other side of the river but I needed the workout and I started to paddle. I got about halfway across and almost gave up until Howard urged me on and called me a “wuss”. My arms burned, I nearly hyperventilated as I paddled against two opposite currents swirling together. I thought I’d never make it.

But I did. Howard hi-fived me and we leisurely paddled around the slew and eventually got back into the current that floated us down and back to land.

As we drove home, I felt an amazing high. My endorphines were going crazy. I was happy. Happier than I’ve felt in a long time.

I called to let Dusty know we made it home alive and he could immediately tell that I was feeling better just by the sound of my voice.

I’d been in a funk for a few days. While I’m a big advocate of chemical help (legal that is) when needed, truth be told, it just hadn’t been working for me for a while.

Last night, as I floated down that gorgeous river nestled between mountains covered in rolling, green hills, the blue sky reflected on the water and nothing in my ears but the sounds of an eagle in a tree, or a beaver splashing its tail, or Howard and I talking about everything and nothing, I felt so much peace.

I felt purged. Clean. Renewed. I breathed in all that fresh air and exhaled all that negative energy out of my body. I felt proud that I’d pushed my limits and made it across that damn mouth. My arms were pleasantly sore, my abs ached. But my mind was clear. I felt nothing but gratitude.

And I knew that no matter what happens in my life or how weird my mind gets at times that I need only to get out and take in the enormous beauty of the world. Let it get under my skin and into my soul and everything will always be okay.

Aug 12

-barefoot in the grass.

-Cold, sweet, iced tea.

-Swimming in my aunt’s pool.

-trips to Myrtle Beach.

-Sunburn

-Swimming in Wilson’s Creek

-Finally living where I could be at the beach within 15 minutes.

-BBQ’s on Friday nights with our Wilmington gang, tiki torches, Howard manning the grill.

-The cool relief of dusk.

-Seeing fireflies in the bushes and when I was younger, catching them in my hand.

-Summer romances when I was younger and unmarried.

-Carowinds every chance we got.

-horseback riding in Banner Elk.

-Napping in the hammock.

Sometimes I do miss summers in the south…especially when it’s cold and rainy in August here.  If you have southern roots, August is the month you all dread because it’s the hottest and the muggiest.  At times it seems weird to have endless amounts of daylight in the summer and have your hottest day only be around 85.

But most of the time, I’m still happy I live here and not there anymore.

Aug 11

Everytime this song comes on the radio and Howard and I are in the same room, we always look at each other and smile.  Usually, Howard will summon me to his arms and we talk about how this song was totally us in the early part of our marriage.
My sweet teddy bear.
I love you, Howard.  Thank you for being so wonderful and amazing.

“A Better Life” Keith Urban

Friday night and the moon is high,
I’m wide awake just watchin’ you sleep
And I promise you you’re gonna have,
More than just the things that you need
We ain’t got much now, we’re just starting out
But I know somehow paradise is coming.

Chorus :
Someday baby,
You and I are gonna be the ones, good luck’s gonna shine
Someday baby,
You and I are gonna be the ones, so hold on, we’re headed for a better life.

Oh now theres a place for you and me,
Where we can dream as big as the sky.
I know its hard to see it now,
But baby someday we’re gonna fly,
This road we’re on, you know it might be long,
But my faith is strong, its all that really matters.

repeat Chorus:

So hold on, hold on, c’mon baby, hold on,
Yeah we’re gonna have it all, and ooh

repeat chorus twice :

A better life now, oh ho, a better life
Hey we’re gonna leave this all behind us baby, wait and see.
We’re headed for a better life, you and me.
We’re gonna break the chains that bind and, finally we’ll be free.
We’re gonna be the ones that have it all, you and me.
Just hold on tight now baby, woooh

Aug 11

Dusty:  We should go to New Orleans and have Bidets on Bourbon Street.

Chrissy:  Bidets?  What the hell are you talking about?

Dusty:  I mean, NOT BIDETS, what’s that other thing called?

Chrissy:  Beneigts? *as she’s giggling*

Dusty:  Yes, oh God, I can’t believe I said that.

Chrissy:  God, that’s so adorable, I’m blogging about it tomorrow.

Dusty:  No!  You can’t!

Chrissy:  Oh, I can!

And I just did.

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