The Last Psychotic Episode

…of 2005. *sigh*

Yesterday, my stress level reached its peak and blew its top and I flipped out all good and proper.

We were all determined to get a headstart on the dreaded inventory. We were all determined that if we had to get our steak and beer to go on Friday night just to finish counting the backroom and work all day Saturday to finish counting the warehouse, then by god, we would. Because New Year’s Day is for relaxing and contemplating 2006 (or whatever year it may be) and for nursing hangovers. AND we can pre-count anything we want before inventory day so long as we know it isn’t going to be sold.

Aaaanyway, Howard, Bruce and Chris (the quasi son) got to work and when they were done with their first section, we decided to do a “test” download to the computer. Little hint? THIS VERY THING is the big reason why I stress out so much. (long story having to do with an inventory that went awry because for two days the shit didn’t download, needless, I am traumatized)

So I plugged in the download cable and set up the program in the computer and tested the download.


my heart lurched a bit…the blood rushed to my face…I tried again…


Howard, sitting with me practically holding my hand, anticipating a bad reaction calmly said. “okay we have two cables, let’s try the other one, maybe this one is just bad”, we switched the cables (god the content of this journal is fascinating lately, no?).

*still nothing*

I immediately called the help desk and placed a “critical” call. I left a frantic message that I’m sure made NO sense.

Howard then calmly (fucker drives me nuts he’s so calm sometimes) suggested maybe I should re-start the entire computer.

With an eyeroll, I give in and restart the computer.

*now the god damn keyboard isn’t working*

*panic ensues on Chris’s part*

Howard tells me to chill out. I restart the computer AGAIN. The keyboard works now. Howard actually has the nerve to say “see? I told you that’s all it was”.

*that sent me over the edge*


Aaaahh, I instantly felt better. Let’s have a bit of chaos, shall we?

He fired back:


Bruce witnesses all of this. It’s the first time he’s ever seen me and Howard interact this way. (even though Ben and Kristen can tell some stories, because oh boy, did we ever have some arguments up there)

He walks in the office and rubs my shoulder and says “Chris, don’t worry, I won’t let you down, we’ll get through this.” I realized how ridiculous I was acting. I took a deep breath and tried the download again.

*works beautifully*

I sigh a big sigh of relief and Howard hugs me. We apologize for being assholes to each other. The boys finish the entire backroom and the walk in freezer. We don’t have to get our steak and beer to go, we can sit at the bar, enjoy our meal and have a few beers. The queen bitch is pleased. Everyone lives another day.

And I reflect and realize that in 2006, I will try not to stress out over trivial things…because clearly there are bigger issues to worry about. I have a good life, a husband who puts up with me, friends and family who do the same, I work for a company that invested more money into us just so we would continue to work for them, I have money in the bank, food in my tummy, I’m taking awesome vacations and seeing the world. I didn’t lose my house or loved ones to a massive flood, hurricane, or mudslide. I didn’t lose my job because of foreign trade. I’m not dying of Cancer or AIDS or god forbid, the bird flu. And neither are any of my loved ones. Sure, we all have problems, and wish for things we don’t have..but I could be doing A LOT worse. In 2006, when I’m stressing out over a stupid download cable, I’ll try to stop and remember that at least I have a job, and that if given a choice of any of the previous bad things? I’ll take that stupid download cable over anything.

HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone!!!!!

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